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Down the road.. - After Abortion
You Are Not Alone
Down the road..
I have read up on stories of you girls who feel hopeless or sad right now and don't know when it will end. I thought I'd share my own story of my life since my abortion.

I had my abortion over 7 years ago, and I can look back at that time and say that I absolutely made the right decision. Everyone's situation is different, so it's hard for people to come together and comfort each other if you're not sure where the other person was coming from. Me, I was dating a complete asshole and thinking of having something inside me that was his made me physically ill. However, I was in the clinic with a young lady my age who said she already had a child and so her husband said they couldn't have another. I will never forget her.

I remained with the man I was dating for almost a year, then I attempted suicide and ended up having to sleep in my mother's room at 23 years old to feel safe. What a disaster. He had such a terrible effect on me; looking back, I can't believe I was ever that person. And that abortion? It was something I had to do. Being tied to that man for my entire life was not an option. It just wasn't. And I see it the same way now. My mother won't talk to me about it. My fiance (who is a-maz-ing) knows, and is proud of me for doing something terribly difficult.

I feel badly about being stupid enough to get pregnant by a total jerk. I feel badly about the terrible physical pain I put myself through to rid myself of the baby I did not want. But do I regret my decision? Absolutely not. I feel like I did something that is unnatural to a woman in aborting her child, but I have dealt with those feelings and moved on. You can't dwell on things - you just can't. Get professional help. Call a hotline. Demand your BFF's full attention. Something. The one thing that I found in my journey was that yes, even the most confident women who choose abortion have emotions about their experience. Regardless of your personal situation, those feelings need to be dealt with in a healthy manner or yes, it will feel deep and dark and endless.

I hope for the very best for all of you out there who may be suffering tonight. You are NOT alone. But you do have to be proactive in your healing process by seeking help for feelings that you may want to hide. You're not alone and you WILL heal. I am planning a wedding now, talking about having babies, and I am so excited.. Because this is the RIGHT one. And I had to let go of any kind of negativity, shame, or guilt to be able to accept the wonderful positive things in life. You can, too.

Good luck.
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eyelid From: eyelid Date: July 28th, 2010 08:40 pm (UTC) (Link)
I'm glad to hear you're doing well :) I know that was a difficult time for you. Thanks for sharing your after-story :)

I feel badly about being stupid enough to get pregnant by a total jerk.

Don't feel bad. these things happen.
sunrunnersioned From: sunrunnersioned Date: October 28th, 2010 01:51 am (UTC) (Link)
It's good that you're doing so well....I'm doing better than I thought. Right after it happened I was in so much shock...it's been a year now and I don't know it still shakes me up sometimes, but I know it was for the better.

Ya know I remember the stories of the other girls who were with me, they are completely ingrained on my memory....how interesting.
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